Most of you know, but my daughter was diagnosed almost 3 yrs ago (at the age of 1 yr old) with type 1 diabetes.
It has been a rough ride to say the least, and also a solo ride.
I am writing this tonight to voice my opinion on "thinking positive".
I know that there is alot of negativity, mourning, sorrow, grief, anger, & other feelings floating about the Diabetes community.
Sometimes the negativity is so thick that I see others jumping on board and following the same behavior. I worry sometimes about the "newbies" coming into the diabetes community and seeing all the negativity. Will they follow suit? How will they react? Will they think this is what D is about? How will they in turn handle D in their own homes and lives? Will they run for the hills and lose all connection with the DOC? How will their D child feel?
Having your child or a loved one diagnosed with Type 1 is no picnic in the park. This is now a life long disease, and not only does the type 1 have to deal with it, but we as parents, spouses, caregivers, etc have to deal with this beast. D changes EVERYTHING regardless of how positive we are. Does that mean we should let it consume us? Not at all! But unfortunately, sometimes it does.
We are all different, and handle things differently. Some grieve for a loooong time....some get the wind knocked out of them and get back on their feet and move forward, some hate life and do not understand why this has happened to them or their child, and others pull back and mourn, and go into a depression. *Not everyone can jump on the bull and ride like a pro the first round.
Personally, I am fortunate to be a very strong person and I did not have the DOC when my child was diagnosed, and I had no one to lean on, vent to, or even get advice from. I had no choice but to be strong, not only for myself, but for my 1 yr old child who relied on me to be.
We are all different in many ways, but yet so much alike in other ways. We are supposed to support each other, be there for each other, and help lift each other up. Not everyone can be strong or positive, and not everyone can be mad, angry, or sad.
We are all sleep deprived in some way or another, and sometimes we tend to take things personal, or we say things out of frustration or use different wording and someone's feelings get hurt.
Lets all be supportive and understanding and remember that we need each other.
I don't understand how sorrow, grief and anger are negative. They are all part of the ebb and flow of this disease. We all go through hills and valleys, and I wholeheartedly agree with you, we need to support everyone, regardless where their feelings are taking them. Because whether they are balanced, being knocked over, or standing on the edge...they need support, and they need to know they are not alone. They need to know that we have been where they are...that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. That we made it to the other side, and that they can too! They need to know that it gets better!ReplyDelete
Sorrow is not negativity. It is real...and whether we admit it or not, we have all been there. Do peoples fears scare off the newbies? Only the newbies can tell you that. All I can say is it always makes me feel better to see I'm not alone in my fears. Sure, when a child passes away, I need to take a few days off from facebook. That is how I deal with it. Everyone has their own way of dealing. I hope that we all can respect that.
Thanks for your post!
I love your last line..."Lets all be supportive and understanding and remember that we need each other."ReplyDelete
I think the Diabetes Online Community is awesome because when I am frustrated or down, there is someone else there to lift me up. I see it as a see-saw. Sometimes I'm the one needing the lift and hopefully there are many times that I am/will be able to give that lift to others.
I appreciate the point about not letting D consume us (although as you said sometimes it does doesn't it?) I also think that reading around the DOC may seem like D is all-consuming...because it IS all about D! Personally, in the DOC, I don't post nearly as much about my personal going-ons as I do about D. So, I try to remember that the wonderful, amazing people whom I have met in the DOC are most likely way more faceted than their handful of postings about D.
Thank you for this reflective post. I NEED the DOC and look forward to its support for a long time to come!
Thank you ladies for sharing your thoughts with me on this, and thank you for taking the time out to read.ReplyDelete
It has been very hard for us as well as we come to grips with the reality that D not only changes the person diagnosed but also the family that supports them and every one around them. It has been shown in research studies that chronic conditions and pain tangibly take a toll on primary care providers as well as the patient.ReplyDelete
"Many providers criticized themselves because they felt unable to treat chronic pain effectively. Many internalized their lack of success with pain treatment, felt stress, and had guilty feelings.”
Seeking out the support systems for providers is just as important as seeking out peers for your daughter who also have type1 to foster a sense of support and understanding.
I would like to say thanks for the efforts you have made compiling this article. I’ve forwarded this to a friend of mine.ReplyDelete
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